CHANGING FAMILY LIFE

I remember my grandmother saying, “No house is big enough for two families.”    Families once consisted of a father, a mother, their children, and a pet or two.  At that time it was common practice for parents to raise their children until they were married and left to raise their children and build their own lives. Mothers worked at home and cared for the children and fathers worked outside the home. 

Family life has taken on a whole new face in the past 60 years or so.  In this so-called “sandwich” generation families now come in many varieties.  Single parent families and blended families have become prevalent; as are grandparents raising their grandchildren and sometimes supporting a child or two that either never left, or has come back to the nest. Some fathers are working at home and caring for children while mothers work outside the home.  Then there is the relatively new family category of full-time caregivers to elderly relatives.  This is where we fit in.

My husband Charles and I have raised two children each and enjoy frequent visits with them and our five grandchildren.  Charles is retired from public work and raises beef cattle on our farm.  I am retired from city government and work on contract as projects coordinator for a non-profit organization.  When it became apparent that my mother could no longer live alone due to increasing stages of Alzheimer’s disease, we moved her in with us in November 2006.   Charles’ mom and dad’s farm adjoins ours where they lived until his dad passed away with Parkinson’s disease in March 2007.  His mother was 87 at the time and didn’t really want to live alone, so she moved in with us in November 2007. 

As with all families, there are times when you send up a silent prayer or just take a cleansing breath and times when you need to leave the room to fall on your face and pray or cry.  Sometimes you may even need to walk out into the field and scream.  There are frustrations and hurt feelings, times for apologies and forgiveness, and times for a little extra understanding.  Prayer is a very important part of any family life especially double blended ones like ours. 

Our churches, neighborhoods and schools are made up of all these types of families.  It is extremely important for Christians to consistently pray for all families, especially the non-traditional ones.   James 5:16 states “The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.”  Prayer is the first and best thing that can be done for families such as ours and other non-traditional mixes.  It is important to remember the constant stress and frustration all families deal with.  Even in-tact traditional families will benefit from daily prayer and encouragement from friends, extended family, and church family. 

It may surprise you how a smile or a word of encouragement will lift the spirits of someone in a stressful situation.  Even the simple phrase, “I prayed for you today” may be just the words someone needs to hear.